They are Individuals

31 05 2006

Over the last few days I have been able to spend more quality time getting to know my younger daughter, Annabelle. I’ve been doing simple daddy things like putting her to sleep (even though she still crys loudly into my ears) and carrying her around the house and playing with her while I’m watching TV. (I don’t normally watch TV, however, when I am watching Annabelle and/or Eliana, it is impossible to do anything else).

During my recent quality time with Annabelle, I have noticed that she at 4 months acts a bit differently than Eliana at the same age. First, Annabelle is far more sensative than Eliana was in that she reacts to many sounds when they seem to come by surprise. She can be eating to her heart’s content, and then Eliana will drop something on the floor. She’ll shutter in shock and start looking around for what happened. While this is a normal reaction, Eliana would just keep eating.

When Annabelle is sleepy, she crys. Recently during our quality time together, she will cry on my should (and into my ear), but then her head will fall on my shoulder after only a few minutes and she’ll fall asleep faster. Eliana would not cry at all, unless she didn’t want to go to sleep. However, as soon as I would start rocking her to sleep, she would quiet down, get comfortable and stay awake as long as possible.

When Annabelle was born, I had promised myself that I would treat both girls as alike as possible. I want them both to feel loved and not to feel that we favor one girl over the other. In my mind, that meant that we would treat them the same. But, as I spend more time with a second child I am slowly realizing that you can never treat them exactly the same, and treating the same would be denying their individuality. They both have their own personalities and traits and each will require different ways to deal with these differences. Hopefully over time, we as parents will learn how to handle these differences with equal measure.

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