Telling the Truth

12 04 2007

Last night, as I was taking Eliana and Annabelle to the Gym. I loaded them up in their car seats, and strapped in only Annabelle. I realized that I had forgotten my membership card inside, and quickly ran to get it. Annabelle’s seat is quite high, and Eliana is able to safely get in and out of her seat, so I didn’t fasten her seatbelt.  I also left my ipod, phone and wallet in the center console, since I was only running into the house for a second.

I returned and found that my phone had switched from it’s default mode to showing the Google Maps application I have installed on it.  I also thought that the backlight had been on for quite a long time, as it was on when I left, and it was on when I returned. Putting 2 and 2 together, I realized that Eliana had grabbed my phone and played with it, and returned it to where it was as soon as I opened the garage door.

Now, I had no reason to be angry,and I wasn’t. I know that when I was a kid, I would do similar things when my parents left a toy or other novelty in the car with me. I calmly asked Eliana the question: “Did you touch the phone?”. She responded “No”. I asked again, and again. I was maintaining a calm tone the whole time because I wasn’t angry, I just wanted her to say yes. Each time I asked, she would not maintain eye contact with me.  So, after about the third or fourth time, I stopped asking, and I calmly looked into her eyes, and said “It’s ok if you grabbed it, just tell me”.  She then maintained eye contact, and said “yes”.

Now, this may have been a bad interrogation on my part, but this whole episode took less than 2 minutes to expire. I only hope that I didn’t coax her into saying yes when she still meant no, but this wasn’t like when I would spank her and have her apologize. This time, with the eye contact, I could tell that her “yes” was genuine.  It is my hope, that this simple little situation will help establish trust on a level that I have never achieved even with my own parents.

Powered by ScribeFire.




Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: